New England Brewing Blog

    It’s the end of May and I’ve finally forced myself to sit down and bang one of these things out. I discovered the band The Bird and The Bee and am listening to some re-mixed version of Be My Fucking Boyfriend as I write this.  We here are all looking forward to Andre Balaze this coming Friday. I invited a bunch of new people to come by and check this shit out, as the kids say. Rob and I have been busier than a wash-room attendant at an O.C.D convention. (really it’s not easy). So, Scotch Ale. You are all thinking it, I’m just saying it out loud. We still haven’t gotten label approval yet, which is entirely our fault. I should either ride Rob a bit harder or learn how to do it myself. But I swear it really exists and will be out on the market sooner or later. Hopefully sooner.

       We will be serving beer at the Woodbridge Historical Society’s Tavern Night on Sun. 8-June. I think it’s all sold out but there will be another one in the fall. Also on that night we are holding another fund-raiser for love146.org. John Gorka will be playing and there will be appetizers, wine and of course beer. If you would like to attend, and I can’t stress how good a cause this is, you can contact us here at the brewery or contact Rob’s sister Eileen Porter at e-mail: BENEFITLOVE146@GMAIL.COM or by telephone:(203)-605-7923.

      The latest edition of Draft magazine came out last week and in an article entitled Ten Beers You Should Drink Out of a Can, our very own Sea-Hag I.P.A came in a very respectable third. So if you’re going to be spending part of the summer outdoors, camping,boating,fishing, etc. remember to bring some damn good, fresh, local beer along with you. You probably won’t regret it. I mean you might regret it if you do something really stupid, but we won’t be held responsible for actions done while, before, or after consuming our product. So, cut the apron strings and hold yourself accountable for your actions. Only you can police you. On that, somewhat, libertarian note I’m going to sign off and, if  I don’t see you, have a great summer. You should try to stop by for one of our Final Fridays while the weather is good and the garage doors stay up.

    yours, fondly but platonically, Rob and Eric

    It’s the end of May and I’ve finally forced myself to sit down and bang one of these things out. I discovered the band The Bird and The Bee and am listening to some re-mixed version of Be My Fucking Boyfriend as I write this.  We here are all looking forward to Andre Balaze this coming Friday. I invited a bunch of new people to come by and check this shit out, as the kids say. Rob and I have been busier than a wash-room attendant at an O.C.D convention. (really it’s not easy). So, Scotch Ale. You are all thinking it, I’m just saying it out loud. We still haven’t gotten label approval yet, which is entirely our fault. I should either ride Rob a bit harder or learn how to do it myself. But I swear it really exists and will be out on the market sooner or later. Hopefully sooner.

       We will be serving beer at the Woodbridge Historical Society’s Tavern Night on Sun. 8-June. I think it’s all sold out but there will be another one in the fall. Also on that night we are holding another fund-raiser for love146.org. John Gorka will be playing and there will be appetizers, wine and of course beer. If you would like to attend, and I can’t stress how good a cause this is, you can contact us here at the brewery or contact Rob’s sister Eileen Porter at e-mail: BENEFITLOVE146@GMAIL.COM or by telephone:(203)-605-7923.

      The latest edition of Draft magazine came out last week and in an article entitled Ten Beers You Should Drink Out of a Can, our very own Sea-Hag I.P.A came in a very respectable third. So if you’re going to be spending part of the summer outdoors, camping,boating,fishing, etc. remember to bring some damn good, fresh, local beer along with you. You probably won’t regret it. I mean you might regret it if you do something really stupid, but we won’t be held responsible for actions done while, before, or after consuming our product. So, cut the apron strings and hold yourself accountable for your actions. Only you can police you. On that, somewhat, libertarian note I’m going to sign off and, if  I don’t see you, have a great summer. You should try to stop by for one of our Final Fridays while the weather is good and the garage doors stay up.

    yours, fondly but platonically, Rob and Eric

     It’s the end of April and two final Fridays have come and gone. We’ve been busier than a one-armed bartender at an Irish wake. Parker’s Tangent played a few days ago and, as usual, rocked the casbah pretty hard. I just have trouble getting used to a band that shows up on time and plays promptly.Still trying to find time to get back to N.Y.C. to do some more sales and keep up with all the local shit that’s been going down. Rob says I swear too much in these here ‘blogs but my understanding is that you have to be at least 21 to view the site. If you’re not then you are just a liar, a no-good, filthy, stinking liar.

    We’ve been promising that damn Scotch Ale for so long now even I’m starting to disbelieve in it. Then I go downstairs and see it for myself and am reborn with faith. It’s real and as soon as we possibly can we will get it into your greedy little hands. Label approval takes time, so as long as you keep believing, and are pure of heart, it will come to you.

    Mexico. What a long and involved process it took to get there and how awesomely rewarding it was. We made a rule and stuck to it; “No international Incidents”.  With the exception of the lesbians that crashed the wedding, all went well. Now get this straight, I’ve got nothing against lesbians, heck, if it doesn’t break my leg or pick my pocket I don’t care what people do. But this was a Catholic wedding, dammit. You can’t go around making people all uncomfortable and such. Hell, I’m no saint, but even I waited for the cloak of night before getting nekkid and jumping in the sea, Sea of Cortes; check. One more body of water for my personal check-list. What’s next? Maybe the “jaws” bridge. We ate a shit-ton of fish tacos and averaged fifteen or twenty beers a day. Hey, you can’t drink the water and all the beers were 4.5% alcohol at most. I even brushed my teeth with beer on more than one occasion. We screwed around, swam, got drunk, tipped like crazy and even learned a little bit of spanish. We saw cows, road-runners, cacti and even a skulking pair of, what I swear were Chupacabras, or Chupacabrae, or chupacabri. I won’t mention the dog we hit and most likely killed on the way home in case Jenny reads this. So, if she is reading this that never happened , just a bad joke. But I don’t think she reads this, so it was kind of a bummer and the karmic forces of life rewarded us with an hour-long detour to a sodium-silicate mine. Very scenic.

     Andre balaze(sp?) will be playing at the end of May. He’s really good and you should totally check him out. I’ve been watching this M.I.A. video, Paper Planes, a lot lately on Youtube. I kind of have a thing for South-Asian women with English accents, but then again who doesn’t?  I’ve officialy run out of things to say so I’m signing off.

         Keep the faith, watch your back and don’t forget to tip your servers, you’ve been great and I mean that.     Eric and Rob, but mostly Eric

      As it’s the 27th of Mar. I obviously survived parade day and am back at the micro-electronic interface to blog at y’all. The parade was nowhere near as annoying as past years, maybe the doormen were doing a better job at keeping assholes out than usual. Thanx again Bryan and Chris.Maybe it was all the extra Valium I took. I only saw one fight and it was after my shift and I was outside smoking and these two dudes totally threw down for a good minute and a half before the cops started slamming their faces into the pavement. Why didn’t I do anything about it? Well for one it wasn’t in front of the Anchor, two I was technically off-shift and three, it was fucking hilarious. Oh, yeah. There was a girl in the bar drinking, and I quote, “whiskey”. No name brands, no particular style, she wasn’t even picky about the country of origin. Now that’s what I call a real trooper.

   We’ve been busier, this past month, than Cajuns at an all-night crawfish shack. We’ve had orders going out like crazy and we’re still trying to get out to do some sales now and again. So many new bars and restaurants have been opening up it’s hard to keep track of it all.If you’ve been frequenting a particular place that does not serve our beer why don’t you ask them to ? It wouldn’t kill you to give us a little sales help. You may even earn the, coveted, Friend of the Brewery title. ”What do I have to do to earn that?” I can almost hear or at least imagine you saying. You could ask Stan”The Man” Patterson or Amy “Doc Savage” Savage. They know how to roll with a local brewery, believe you-me. And if you thought we had your backs before, once you become a F.O.B. we pull out all the stops. Last month’s band Neverready was really kick-ass and they had a wonderful time entertaining all the lovely people in attendance. This coming Fri. will feature the song stylings of the legendary, nay! nearly mythical, James Velvet. If you’ve never seen James “Doctor-love” Velvet, then you, my friends, have been missing out. Come on by for a nice refreshing beer after work and say “Hi” to everyone. We’re truly sorry to anyone we couldn’t let in last month but once we get over a hundred people in the joint Rob starts to get, understandably, nervous. So, try to get here as early as possible. If you see me and I don’t remember your name don’t feel bad. I’m getting older and names are hard things to remember. What you drink, drive and smoke says a lot about you. All your name says is what your parents hoped you would one day become.

     The Scotch ale is now in the label-approval stage so it should be released in the next few weeks. Some people have already ordered some so it should sell like hot and fluffy flapjacks on a cold,windy day.

     I’m going to be going to Mexico next month so I’m trying to teach myself some Spanish, you know just enough to get by, for example: “Donde esta el chupacabra?”. Important stuff like that.  My buddy Pete is getting married there to a seriously terrific girl. Also my friend D.H.RII will be there. Hijinx are predicted and if I make it back in one piece I’ll let you in on some. 

      Jeff Browning wants me to inform you about the next Great American Beer Festival trip. So I’m going to. The trip takes place from Wed. 8th to Sun.12th of Oct. The trip goes to Denver Co. Jeff has packages that include air-fare, motel and transportation to and from the airport. All that for $900. Food and booze are your own deal. Signing up early lets Jeff  get a better deal than waiting ’til the last minute. If you are interested he will probably be here on Fri. the 28th for the band. You can also contact him via E-mail at beerman599@netscape.net.  We went last year and may go again this year. We had a wonderful time and it is highly recommended.

     That’s all for now, just remember, you can’t spell slaughter without laughter.

                       Your go-to guys, the ones that have your back and all, Rob and Eric.

  I have trouble thinking of titles for this thing so I’m just going to go with whatever crosses my mind first from now on. We’ve been busier than a one-legged man at a kick the can contest (?).  Last month’s final Friday with Good To Go was a big hit and we think Feb.’s is going to be even bigger. Never Ready is the band on tap for this gig, and we’re really looking forward to it. The people that got a taste of the scotch ale were blown away by it and some of the Beer Advocate people will be coming by on the 29th for a taste at final Friday. 29th? Of February? Yes! That’s right, it’s a goddam leap year. You can always tell it’s a leap year ’cause that’s when the politicos rev up their bullshit machines to yammer at ya the most. We don’t discuss politics at the brewery ’cause if we did everyone would find out I’m a gun-loving Libertarian and slowly back away towards the door.

    Jeff Browning’s Real Ale Festival was super-cool but I wasn’t there very long on account of not really wanting to drink beer that early in the day after a late night at work.(waaah! waaah! I’m bitching again. My life is so hard being surrounded by great beer all the time . waaah! waah!) The Anchor is still doing their Tuesday night special on our beer and it is going quite well. I hope to see more of you there soon. Come on up to the bar and say,”HI!”, just don’t expect me to remember anymore names. I’ve decided that if I met you after I turned thirty-five I don’t have to.

   We shipped a hell of a lot of beer out of here lately and a bunch of it went to N.Y.City the town so nice it’s motto is about apples. This coming Monday the 25th Rob and I will be going on what the industry calls a ride along. It’s a lot like a drive-by but instead of shooting, you attempt to sell beer. Afterwards there will be an official Kick-off of our brands at The Diamond in Brooklyn, the town so nice they don’t need a motto, unless thay have one, I’m not really sure. We will be bringing a small keg of the super special Imperial Stout Trooper we had hidden away. So if you’re up for a road trip come and meet us there.

   I got roped into working on Parade day again this year. At my estimate this will be the fifteenth time I’ve done it. Every year I swear I won’t do it again, and every year I end up right there on the front lines. Every year I think it won’t be more disguting and obnoxious as last year and every year the great people of New Haven prove me wrong. Maybe some day I’ll learn. But it probably won’t be today. My brother, Chris, (owner of both the Woodbridge and Northhampton running companies) will be working the door at the Anchor, so don’t give him a hard time, just fork over the I.D.  This year has an added twist. The parade is on the ninth. Early so as not to coincide with the Catholic Spring holidays. That means that for the first time in my memory the Yalies won’t be at Spring break. Yeah! A couple thousand more drunken morons will be out on the streets binge-drinking, puking and attempting to fornicate in such ugly, sloppy and degrading ways that if you’ve never seen it before you wouldn’t believe me. Phil Moore and I tried to explain it to one of the new girls at the bar but she thought we were exaggerating. In a few weeks she can find out for herself. And so can you ,if you’re anxious to be a part of the revelry or just have a morbid curiousity to see how low a human being can sink when normal rules of society are, temporarily, lifted. P.S. I love Irish people. I just hate their damn parade.

   On the actual St. Patrick’s day, Mar. 17th, Rob and Deals will be playing their guitars and singing their little hearts out at Delaney’s from six ’til closing time. I’ll probably be there so come on up and say “HI!”, you can also buy me a beer if you want , what the hell, it wouldn’t kill you. And I would definitely enjoy it. Then scram. I don’t need people hanging around while I get my drink on.

                          Eternally yours and totally having your back,

                             Rob and Eric, but mostly Eric.

  Yes, yes, I know that I keep promising to do this more often. In fact that’s a lie, I’ve never promised anything. That’s just how I roll, NO PROMISES. If that bugs you just buy some wood and nails, build a bridge and get over it. I would have blogged sooner but I’ve been moving and I got really sick just after X-mas and we’ve been busier than a professional busy-making guy on his busiest day, using an automatic busy machine. (Go ahead you keep coming up with witty similes all the time, seriously try it out.)

    So a lot of shit’s been going on around here, the Final Fridays have been great but I overheard someone saying we weren’t going to have them through the Winter. That is simply not true. It’s a lie, a filthy, filthy lie.Last month was 39 Fingers and they’re always a good time. This coming Friday will feature Good To Go, an old fashioned, simple rock-n-roll duo. We’ve gotten a lot of phone calls lately about it so it may be well-attended. There may even be secret tastings of the super-special, super-secret, super-duper scotch ale. Just talk to Rob or me and mention the secret password. It’s “swordfish”. If you got that reference,(and it’s an easy one) give yourself five points.

   As you may have figured out, the scotch ale won’t be out by X-mas. But it will be out in a month or so. Some people have heard rumors about the name, but that’s all they are: rumors. You’ll find out the name when everyone else does. There is a reason for this. I’m just not going to tell you what it is.

     This coming Sunday the 27th is Jeff Browning’s annual kick-ass Real Ale Festival and we will be there representing as always. Come up and say “hi!” so we know if anyone reads this damn blog. Or am I just barking in the dark here. If you didn’t already get tickets, don’t fret. It won’t do you any good. They’re all sold out. There’s always next year. This event is, for lack of a better word, awesome. All the brewers attending bring out their big guns in a kind of fun and friendly way of trying to prove whose got the biggest set on ‘em. This is good for you and fun for us ’cause we all get to try some fan-fucken-tastic beers.

      We got a call from some dude who distributes beer in both of the Carolinas and he seems interested in selling our beer. That’s one piece of good news that flew our way recently. Another bit of morale-boosting info: Beer Advocate Magazine came out with their top 25 issue. Top 25 American Breweries: Guess who came in at a very respectable 17th ? Go on guess. Give up? It was us. That’s right l’il ol New England Brewing Co. Two mooks from Amity high school and a handful of volunteers in the top 25. I think Rob and I both popped a few vest buttons over that one. We spend so much time on the day-to-day running of this place and often feel like we’re running to stand still, it was real nice to get some recognition. More good news? YES ! Rob had another child this month, (although technically his wife, Liz did most of the work). It’s a boy and I can’t wait to get my hands on one of those cigars. They named him Henry David Leonard, after some family members not that guy who hung out in the woods hugging trees. How could Thoreau afford to spend months screwing around in a cabin in the woods? I hear you ask. Because his folks owned a pencil factory, that’s why. If any of you knew that obscure fact it’s worth at least fifteen points.

    None of the information in this rant is coordinated by time. It’s a failing of mine to be so chronically disordered. My memories are like a shoe box full of Polaroids that have been shuffled around. So back to Dec. The Christopher-Martin’s road race was a huge success and everyone had a great time except for yours truly, I had, maybe, two or three hours of sleep the night before and was feeling a little shattered. My sleep woes have not abated since the summer, but noone wants to hear me whine,” I don’t get enough sleep, I’m falling asleep at work, I’m falling asleep when I drive whaa, whaa”.

    The results of The First-annual Burn-a-C.D. For the Brewery Contest are in! Third place goes to the guy with the best packaging, whose name I can’t remember but he has a radio show called Wires-in-the-Walls on WNHU, second place goes to the liquor-and -whores guy, (that song alone helped get us through the summer) first place goes to Drew Cucuzza, whose name we know ’cause he , wisely, wrote his name on the C.D. We should have kept all the packaging for all the contestants but, hey we’re guys you can’t expect too much of us. You know who you are so come by Final Friday or otherwise contact us. An honorable mention goes to R.J. the lawyer for that incredibly creepy, yet oddly compelling song “Mister I Like Your Daughter”. Remember that all contestants get a free N.E.B. pint glass. We had a lot of entries and had fun listening to them all, thanks go out to all of you, and here’s a hint for next year, David Lee Roth ? I don’t think so. We do admire your guts though. 

           Eternally-back-havingly yours Rob and Eric.

   I was uninformed of this coming event at the time of last posting, so, please forgive the lateness.  We here at N.E.B are trying to pay it back,so to speak, as much as possible and make our facilities and products available to worthy causes whenever they show up. Rob and I have had good lives and even better luck than most people, and are terribly thankful for it. 

   So, on the first of December we’re hosting a Blues and Brews night that will feature our beers, coupled with the music stylings of D.W. Armstrong and The Rent Monthly band. All proceeds will go towards LOVE146.org, a group dedicated to eradicating child sex slavery and exploitation.  Tickets are of limited availability and can be reserved at Love146_benefit@yahoo.com or by calling 203-393-9372. It is a really great cause and a snip at $25- a piece. Doors open at 7:00 pm and appetizers, wine, dessert and the freshest beer around are included in the price. We hope to see you there to help end a senseless tragedy and, at the same time, have a little fun.

    If you can’t make it, but still want to contribute, the above info is valid for that too. We’ll be smartening up the brew space and getting ourselves shaved and gussied up. More ticket information can be had at our final Friday on the 30th.

                Yours R. and E. with your back and all.

   I accidently published this twice, sorry

   Answer: time change buddy! That’s right I’m bloggin’ at you from the far end of the pleasant sunshine-filled days of summer.  It’s finally feeling like autumn out there and I’m going to hook you up to the 411.  We had a great and fun-filled summer and are back to being busy as termites at sawdust camp. Not only are we hard at work on the day-to-day beer making, packaging and selling ; we’re also gearing up for our annual, incredible, awesomely delicious, seasonal special offering. I know we always say it will be ready by X-mas but this time we really mean it. I mean don’t quote me on that or anything because shit always happens and we’re not always as prepared as we should be, but we really do try.

      This time Rob’s got a bee in his bonnet to make a Scotch ale. He assures me this will be an alcohol bomb that will be similar in taste to actual Scotch and all it’s peaty, smoky and malty goodness. It will be be oak-aged and only slightly hopped, so should be no problem vis-a-vis the whole hop shortage thing y’all might have read about. We, as usual, will try to make this fabulous nectar available to as many people as possible. Already pre-orders are coming in but supply will be limited. Bug your local package store and/or bar to try to secure some now before it runs out. “But you haven’t even made it yet !”, I can hear, or at least imagine you screaming. I know but if the Imperial Stout was any indication this shit will sell out fast. Speaking of the Imperial Stout, we thought it had all been gobbled up. Au contraire, mon frere, as the frogs ,so aptly, put it. Hidden away in a dark corner of their cooler is a good five to ten bottles of the stuff. Where ? You may ask. Christopher Martin’s that’s where. And at a good price to boot. You can’t take it home and cellar it but you can enjoy it right there in the restaurant or on their patio, where you can smoke too. I know which I would choose, but the cold doesn’t really bother me much, and nicotine is a bitch of a mistress.

   Andre Balaze and Bipolar were a big hit last month but nobody showed up in costume, so nobody got the extra-special, extra-secret prize. We also didn’t get around to hooking up with Crayg for the final adjudication of the Mixed-C.D. contest.  Everyone who entered will get at least a limited-edition N.E.B pint glass for all their troubles and the final winners will be announced soon. “How soon ?” Soon. “Where ?” Right here on these very virtual pages. This month, Nov., features the Ivory Bills. James Velvet (or Doctor Velvet Love , as I like to call him, even though he isn’t technically a doctor) is a long-time friend of the Brewery and even worked with Rob and myself at the olde New Haven Brewing co. Those were the days, toiling in the summer heat, basking in the glow of respect and admiration from friend and foe alike, sultry nights filled with cigar smoke, glasses of whisky and slowly rotating ceiling fans, or maybe that was a movie I saw once, I’m not quite sure, things blend together sometimes when you get a little older and have a fondness for the bottle. Anyway, he’ll be there and we expect you will too. It’ll be the first closed door event of the season, (unless it’s weirdly warm out) and we all like to huddle together in these cold months. So, show up, bring your friends and have a pleasant little happy hour with us.

      Thanx and wishing you and all of yours an enjoyable beginning to the Holiday season.

               We also hope you don’t need your back taken care of, ’cause we’ll do it, it’s just that we’re kinda busy, what with the shopping and the ale making and…. the holly, and…the mistletoe and…   … oh, fuck it, we’ll get your back any time. Just ask.

        with all possible love and sincerity,  Rob and Eric.

   22-oct-07

     We, alas, did not win anything in Denver, our beers didn’t travel well and we were hurried to get it to the drop-off point, and our car broke down, and our suit was at the cleaner’s, and there was a flood, a hurricane, a tornado, a typhoon, it’s not my fault!. I know, excuses, excuses. But we came back re-energized and ready to fight back. Denver, to those who’ve never been, seems like a cross between New Haven and Hartford.  Interesting architecture mixed with big, shiny glass and steel towers, mixed with endless empty parking lots. We didn’t spend the whole time working, and if you have some inside info and a good map there are a ton of cool bars and breweries in the area. We went to some and only heard about others. Oh, yeah, if your room says non-smoking on the door, and you smoke in it they call you up and bitch you out. We, hereby, give a heartfelt and sincere ”Thanx!” to Jeff Browning for his tireless efforts at organizing what was, in fact, a nearly unorganizable group. You did a great job and I feel I owe you at least a drink. He is planning a trip to Scotland, I hear, and if you want to go and check out all the peaty goodness, for God’s sake, get in touch with him,(Jeff not God, unless you can get in touch with God, if you can I have some questions for you, or maybe they need to up your meds).

  We’ve been busier than little lambs at an insomniac retreat, what with the brewing the kegging and the hey, hey, hey.  More entries have been recieved for the Great, Big, and Fancy C.D. contest, and let me tell you some of them are beauts.

     In typical, mercurial fashion we’ve extended the dead-line ’til this Fri. the 26th.  Post them, drop them off here, get a friend to come by, use Pony Express, whatever, just get them here. Think about it, Valuable prizes, Name recognition, Jealousy of your friends, Fame and…and…valuable prizes, could all be yours for one simple, thin C.D. You know about music, of course you do, just pop some of your favorite ditties an a disc and, “bingo”, you could be a winner! (or not, I promise nothing, except what I’ve already promised, and even then, I might have been drunk, so it doesn’t neccessarily count.)

   This coming Fri., The 26th is Final Friday and this month we have Andre Balaze and Bipolar to entertain y’all and it’s coinciding with both the end of the aforementioned contest and proximity to Halloween, one of my favorite holidays. Please feel free to dress up, uglify yourself, or prettify yourself as befitting this glorious and alcohol-fueled holiday.  If you have entered a C.D. in the contest, and show up this Fri. you will at least receive a special bonus prize I hinted at earlier. You do not have to be present to win anything in the Contest, We’re not that big of dicks. Maybe there will be a special prize for the best costume worn? I, once again, promise nothing, NOTHING!

   I’m starting either to doubt my own sanity or forget Strunk & White’s rules of punctuation. Either way please forgive any errors in my typing, which is done with two fingers, a cigarette clutched in one hand. Oh, yeah and ,of course , a beer in the other.

            We hope to see all of you this Fri. Last month we were taught how to tie a noose, maybe we’ll learn something new this time. Come and have a good time bring your friends and remember any dorsal challenges you encounter, we’ll be there to help.

                                                Rob and Eric